Romance and BDSM

Healthy BDSM:

There is a reason why the anti-romance belief has taken hold particularly among newbies. That is because most of us who come to BDSM after time in the vanilla world, and that is quite a large percentage, tend to initially reject all things vanilla. The key when making a transition to a new lifestyle is to be objective, embrace the good things from your old experiences and discard the bad ones. To reject romance out of hand is counterproductive. If you take a well-structured and hot D/S relationship and add the element of love to it, it can, with rare exceptions, only get stronger. 

Love is whatever makes your heart sing and it is a blessing to find someone to share that with. If you are a kinky lover, celebrate it proudly, even if it is just in the comfort of your own home. Think about all those ways that you are loved in your relationship and how you show to your Dominant or your Submissive that you are still in love. Romance and love has been around for as long as there has been recorded history. So why not incorporate it into BDSM?

No matter what kind of dynamic or relationship you have, there should be some kind of love there. Love is the reason that we voluntarily do anything. With this being said, there are a lot of different kinds of love one could have within their dynamics, not just romantic/sexual love and not only do you need some kind of love to make a healthy BDSM dynamic, but all parties involved need to be able to receive the kind of love they need. 

Conclusion:

BDSM without some kind of love would feel hollow and void of something. Even if you have a service slave, the master still needs to care for them to some degree. BDSM is centered around communication, hard work and transparency. It would be really hard to have these things if you can't stand the person you are in a BDSM dynamic with. So some kind of love and romance is very important for a dynamic because it promotes some ind of care and devotion which is so needed for BDSM to thrive.